Different people can be useful for different projects. Another thing I have learnt over time is that people like being asked for their input and they enjoy discussing ideas – at least those who are any good at it.

When there is a group of you working together – thinking together – try to see yourselves as some kind of hive brain. Each one of you is a single component of a greater entity (idea generation, problem-solving, analysis, organization, figure work, practical skills). Between you, you have all the thinking skills you need. So have some patience, tolerance, understanding of those in the group who think in ways that you do not. Appreciation even. Because without them, the hive cannot function properly in the face of whatever comes along.

Never assume that people who are silent have nothing to say. This is especially true when there are two or more vociferous people in the room. If ideas and comments are flying back and forth – even if it is always fun and friendly – it can be quite daunting to people of a shyer persuasion, or those who consider themselves junior or less qualified to speak. And yet sometimes the sharpest observations can come from people who have a fresh eye, unsullied by experience.

We established it is not helpful if you all think alike and agree with each other most of the time. So, the most useful group is one that thinks differently and whose members often disagree with each other. The group has to express disagreement about it becoming a problem. The single most important way to achieve this is for everyone in the group to understand that it is their job to say if they disagree, and that it is necessary to ensure the group collectively thinks at its very best. Once you know people are briefed to challenge your thinking, and that they likewise expected you to question theirs, it becomes much easier to take. It depersonalises it.

You must have – or find – the confidence to make suggestions even when you think other people might judge them negatively. I have a line I like to use in this situation: ‘I’ve got a stupid idea but I’m going to say it because someone might turn it into a good idea.’ This works for two reasons. First, you do not have to worry people will judge you for having a stupid idea because you have already made it clear you recognise it. And second, instead of rejecting it out of hand (hopefully they would not but who knows), the rest of the group is likely to consider whether there is the kernel of a good idea they can build on. Similarly, make sure the surrounding people know they are always allowed to air ‘stupid’ ideas without fear of censure, and make sure you listen to see if you can think them into more practical ones.